Someone made the comment today that “trust is earned“.  I guess to some people this is an unquestionable belief. If they don’t know you, how would they know if you are worthy of their trust?

Trust is earned. You mean you have a relationship with a friend or lover and you don’t trust this person? How long does it take for he or she to earn your trust? What if it’s years? What is the quality of your relationship with them in the meantime? This is a bit hard for me to imagine.

I suppose one’s early childhood experiences probably set the tone for an individual’s ability to trust others. But I wonder about it ’cause I approach people differently. I assume a person is trustworthy unless or until they prove otherwise. Yeah, I’ve been burned. Not often. I got over it. It has not dampened my belief that people are good and worthy of my trust. And I hope if someone does break my trust, they will have some remorse, recognize what it cost them and perhaps behave differently in the future. I’m a forgiving sort.

I think the “presumed innocent”  approach works really well in parenting children. Believe they are capable. Believe they are strong. Believe they are trustworthy. This will allow them to strive to be all these things.

If instead you assume they can’t be trusted,  how will they ever learn?

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