When I had my daughter, someone gave me a Dr. Spock (he’s the baby guy right?) book about raising children. It looked pretty good as I recall, but was a very thick paperback. ADD’er that I am, I think I read like the first two or three chapters and never picked it up again. I got exactly one piece of good advice from that book and I pretty much applied it to everything from then on.

The one thing I remember him saying was that kids are ready to do things on their own sooner than you think. I seem to recall the example given was using a spoon to feed themselves at age…….. what, two? No, I think it was one year old. Whatever, it was young enough for my reaction to be one of disbelief, “What? Seriously?” But I figured the guy’s widely considered an expert. He must know something. I gave the kid a spoon.

Sure enough, she did pretty well and I was amazed. Clearly she had been ready to “step it up” so I started applying this principle to all advancements that were to follow.  There wasn’t much to lose.  You know, if you miss the point when they’re ready for something, ie; a nap, things can become much more difficult. Who needs that?

Once, a couple years ago, my neighbor asked me to watch her two year old for the evening. I hung out with the kid, made him dinner, etc. When she got home we were chatting and I said something like, “he uses a spoon really well.” Her jaw dropped in shock and she asked dubiously, “he fed himself???”. I didn’t know they were still spoonfeeding him. I just assumed he fed himself. He had taken the spoon and eaten his dinner with no indication it was his first time. Pretty cool, huh? 

Obviously, common sense should accompany this theory. No need to court failure by asking your 6 year old to make dinner. So, Dr. Spock says they are ready even though you may not see it. I have found this to be true most of the time. All it requires is a little trust, encouragement, belief and enthusiasm. They’ll succeed. Whether it’s using a spoon, baking a cake, or driving a car.

What will you encourage your child to try on his/her own today?

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